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9.24.2012

GUEST POST: HAZING

Today begins National Hazing Prevention Week. This topic is very close to my heart because I know so many people that have faced hazing. I would like to share a story with you about a friend of mine. Caitlin* has offered to do a guest post today on hazing.

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Going into my freshman year of college I knew that I wanted to join a sorority. I did my research and learned everything I could about the sororities on my campus. It was soon time for recruitment. The week seemed to fly by. I quickly found myself celebrating Bid Day, getting to know members, and meeting my pledge sisters. I was so ecstatic to be a part of this sisterhood.

Before I knew it, it was time for us to select our bigs. I knew exactly who I wanted. Jamie* who preffed me was also the member that I kept in contact with the most. She made sure the transition for school was going well for me, we hung out a lot, and always went to sorority events together. I listed Jamie as my first choice and waited for the excruciating week to learn who my big was. 

During the first few weeks of my new membership in the sorority, I got to know a lot of the members. One girl, Alice*, was from my hometown and we really hit it off. She did not end up preffing me, but I talked to her at every other round during recruitment. She also stayed in contact with me, but I did not connect with Alice as much as I did Jamie.

Big Sis Reveal arrived and my dream that Jamie would become my big came true. I was so excited and could not imagine anyone else in that role. We really bonded with each other even more throughout the week. I could not imagine anyone else as my big. I didn't really think anything of it when Alice stopped texting me. She had gotten a little and we were just doing different things. 

One Thursday evening, I was sitting at the library studying with some of my pledge sisters when I received a text message from Alice. She said some angry things to me about how I was supposed to be her little and she would not stand for the arrangement. Completely shocked, I showed my new member educator. She assured me that I had been paired with the right person. 

I brushed off the occasion as best I could until Saturday evening when I received several text messages and voicemails from Alice. She kept going on and on about how she was going to make my new membership "hell". She demanded that I give her back a couple of gifts that she had given me during the first couple of weeks of joining or she would come get them herself. Again, I informed my new member educator who promised she would handle the situation.

We had new member meetings on Monday evenings immediately following the chapter meetings. I knew that I would see Alice there so I brought her gifts back like she had asked. I was not excited about seeing her at all. This time she told me I needed to get out because I was so disrespectful. My pledge sisters were shocked and many of the chapter members witnessed the altercation. After what seemed like forever, Jamie stepped in and told Alice that she needed to leave immediately.

I found out that Alice was removed as a member of the chapter about two weeks later. To this day, I am in awe of my now Sisters that stepped in and took a new member's side instead of an active member's. I am so thankful for Jamie and my new member educator for always being there for me. For a while, I did not consider what happened to me as hazing. I learned more about it and also learned that is why Alice was removed from our sisterhood. 


I hope my story, while not full of anything wild, lets you know that threatening of any kind is considered hazing. If you ever witness this happening to a Sister or new member, step in and do something about it. If Alice would have continued harassing me, I would have depledged and I would not be a member of the amazing sisterhood that I am today.
*names have been changed to protect individuals

1 comment:

  1. I"m sorry, but I don't think you realize what hazing is, "Anonymous". This girl THREATENED HER just because she didn't get to be her Big. Anything that makes a new member (or even active sister!) feel uncomfortable in your sisterhood is considered hazing. I feel like a girl threatening to make your life Hell just because of a decision that wasn't even 100% hers definitely falls into that category and is in no way "trivial".

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